The honeymoon and an engagement!

I think I'm on my honeymoon...according to the "culture shock scale" that is. The term “culture shock” is often defined by four stages, the first of which is the Honeymoon stage. It is characterized by a fascination with the new culture and an excitement and happiness in learning all there is to learn about the new environment. Being in this stage can last anywhere from a few days to several months depending on a persons circumstances. I think it has lasted so long for me because I am not fully integrated into the culture here (I still have a large group of Americans I come home to every night.) Even though I've gotten to know people in this country and worked alongside them and have gotten to see their lives, I still have my safety net. It's been really great being here, I have literally loved every minute of it. Sure, there have been some awkward, unusual moments- but those are just things we get to laugh about later. What a blessing it has been to have such a positive experience...but I can't help but wonder what stage I would be at if I were living here completely immersed. It's a pity knowing that I am still looking at this country through rose colored glasses when I so badly am trying to figure out what I need to be prepared for if I ever live in a place like this someday or work with these people. I guess that's when I'm reminded that I am relying on the Holy Spirit's direction, and not simply my own human knowledge or desires. These thoughts are not a complaint for not having difficult times, don't get me wrong, I love having good experiences. It is simply a cultural observation. (-:

Well, speaking of honeymoons (that was how this whole post started if you remember) let me share with you about the engagement party I went to today. It is just one more of the experiences in this country that I have absolutely loved.

Some of you may recall me mentioning that I help out at a Gypsy center in East Jerusalem once a week and help kids with English and whatever else they need (ok...we play a lot too!) Well, one of the girls who comes to work on English, she's 17, just got engaged! Actually, she wasn't officially engaged until this afternoon at the party when her fiancée paid the “bride price”. Marwa is marring a man who is 27 (10 years older-not at all uncommon for them) who is a doctor and a friend of her brother. Her brother arranged the marriage for Marwa (though she did get to offer her opinion) because her father passed away. She knows very little about him, yet they will be married in April.

When Kaytlin and I first arrived, we were hustled through the living room, where all the men were gathered, and back into Marwa's bedroom where she was waiting with some relatives and close friends. She was very “decked out” in a gold trimmed black dress, gold pointy shoes, tons of gold makeup, gold glitter in her curly hair, and even gold lipstick! (What we see as gaudy is seen as the beautiful ideal in many places here). We waited in the back room with the other women, our heads poked out the door, as the men read several Suras from the Qur'an (Muslim holy book). They then went outside the apartment, in the middle of the city, and shot off a ton of guns. After that, they left, and it was the women's time! All the women (probably around 25) stuffed themselves into another small room in the back where really great Arabic music was played and first Marwa, and then a few other women, began to dance in a tiny open place in the middle of the floor while the rest of us looked on clapping and smiling. They danced for around a half hour before her fiancée, Zakie, came in. He was the only man present for the engagement ceremony. This ceremony consisted of him giving her two necklaces, two bracelets, 3 bangles, 1 pair of earrings, and three rings- all big, heavy, and gold! They were now considered engaged and they then danced together with nothing but their hands ever touching. Zackie left after a while and the women, young and old, big and little, danced for at least another hour. The women would take turns, two or three at a time, dancing (and let me tell you, those women can shake their hips! Even grandma could bust some moves!) It was amazing. We had to get up and dance a few times, and, not surprisingly, we were their free entertainment for the night. (-: I have determined that ethnic dance classes might be in order as part of my Intercultural studies degree...

Here's a picture of us girls with Marwa after the party. Can you believe she's only 17!?!

Kaytlin, Erin, Marwa, Megan, me, and Christina

(Erin, Christina, and Megan came later and made it just in time for dancing!)